07 April 2011

Some Things Can't Be Ignored

To a lot of my friends, it probably might seem like I have been being distant recently.  Wanna know a secret?  It was all planned.  For the majority of this semester I've been ignoring people.  I want to become a ghost.  I want the impressions that I've left on Binghamton to slowly fade away as if I had never been there.  The reason I'm acting this way is because I don't like farewells.  I dislike finishing books because I'm sad to see the story end for crying out loud.  I don't know why, but feeling like I'm important to people makes me uncomfortable.  However, when it really comes down to it, I can't justify it, and so I won't try to any further.

The point of this post is that I've realized that even though I would like to be forgotten and ignore all my friends, I still need people in my life.  I can't just not make new friends or stop talking to old friends, I just don't have it in me.  I have an undying need to be as social as a butterfly.

With that said, I'd like to say that I'm sorry to all the people I've been ignoring.  I've decided to stop thinking ahead so much.  I'm going to cross all bridges when I come to them and just live my life the way I want to live it, regardless of what lies in store in the future.

On a side note, why the hell does everything I write these days come off as depressing?  The next post I make will be about something more light, I promise =]
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6 comments:

  1. AnonymousApril 7, 2011 at 8:48 AM

    "Maybe you couldn't enjoy your life and put it into the bank, too."

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  2. MattApril 7, 2011 at 8:50 AM

    I'm not sure I understand

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  3. Trystan MadisonApril 7, 2011 at 9:11 AM

    Interesting post. I have the same fear although as a result I'm trying to be more active with my friends and trying to make sure the friendships I have now are stronger by the time of having to say goodbye.

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  4. AnonymousApril 7, 2011 at 9:35 AM

    I was wondering where you were going with this. Announcing yourself as a person who prefers to ditch people before leaving for a new place is a sure way to piss some people off.

    On an equally depressing and perhaps self-incriminating note, I've found that burning bridges is a lot easier than everyone thinks. There's just a few things to learn about social pressure first.

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  5. MattApril 7, 2011 at 9:41 AM

    I mean, I don't want to sound like a negative person. I never intended to make people angry with me. Ignoring people was just my way of softening the blow of my farewell. However, I don't think I'm going to continue with what I was doing... it just doesn't fit my personality and character.

    As for burning bridges, I don't think thats ever a good idea. I don't harbor enough anger for anyone to go out of my way and piss them off

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  6. AnonymousApril 7, 2011 at 1:40 PM

    "Maybe you couldn't enjoy your life and put it into the bank, too."

    "I'm going to cross all bridges when I come to them and just live my life the way I want to live it, regardless of what lies in store in the future."

    It's the same idea.

    ReplyDelete

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