I'm armed with nothing but a dotted line and big brown eyes

So as you can probably tell from the arbitrary title, this is going to be one of my more 'typical' posts (unlike the last few that I've done).

A few weeks ago I made a post which was titled 'stiletto'. If you haven't read it yet, I suggest you go and read that it before you continue. Its not pertinent to understand what I'm about to write about, but the extra background wouldn't hurt.

That being said, lets just jump right into it, shall we?

I spent the past weekend in Long Island with some friends of mine. I had a social event at 9:30 in Stony Brook, and I wasn't about to make a 4 hour drive all the way down from my home for that one event alone, so I decided to spend the weekend at my friend's house, who lives about 5 minutes away from Stony Brook.

So what I really wanted to talk about were two 'events' that occurred during my weekend endeavors. The first event took place at some grocery store while my friends and I were getting food for dinner. In the store I came across a free sample stand which was being run by a girl who was probably about 19 or 20 years old. Now I didn't really feel like talking, all I wanted was to elicit some kind of response. I just looked over at her, and when she noticed me, all I did was smile. She gave me a nice wide smile back, and I was on my way. Smiles really are contagious, aren't they?

So what was the point of that, Matty? Well, the only thing that I thought was notable about this scenario was that I actually planned out what I wanted to do, and I knew what kind of response I wanted. I mean think about this, when you are usually presented with a similar situation, you act almost purely out of instinct, am I right? This time, I wasn't on autopilot. I was in complete control of the situation, and it played out exactly according to plan.

Now I still don't think this is enough to get at my actual point, so let me talk about the other event that occurred over the weekend.

This next one took place at the social event in Stony Brook that I had to attend, and to be honest, there isn't anything really specific about what happened; I simply had conversations with a couple of people that were present. I keep getting your hopes up, don't I?

Well, the most notable things about these conversations was that I was on the money. What I mean is that I said everything that I wanted to say, I said it how I wanted to say it, and I never made any comments that were misinterpreted or confusing. I was once again in complete control of myself. This may sound pointless, but think about it, don't you usually slip up in conversations every once and a while and say something that you didn't mean to say, thus raising the awkward bar by one or more notches? Have you ever stumbled around for the right descriptive word, but couldn't find the one you wanted in time to complete your thought? Well it may be just me, but I usually tend to speak before thinking and I rapidly come up with the words to finish my sentences as I progress through the actual sentence. Speaking like this can either be a good or a bad thing for me. While I can come off as particularly witty at times, other times I just stumble over my words and manage to construct sentences that lack semantics.

This is what I wanted to get at, I usually tend to go through periods where I constantly fumble around in my conversations, to times where I am completely and uncannily on the ball. Why is that? This usually occurs in one week intervals, and there are usually some long stretches where I am somewhere inbetween the two extremes.

To help me get into this, I looked up the following definitions:

well·-spoken (wel′spō′kən)
adjective

1. speaking easily or fluently
2. speaking in a courteous or gracious manner
3. properly or aptly spoken

unintelligible
adjective

1. not intelligible; not capable of being understood.

What I found both interesting and amusing, was "well-spoken" being used in a sentence:

He is very well-spoken, intense, funny, dipping into funk speech when he wants to, and very smart.

Dipping into funk speech. Haha. While that statement is mostly just humorous, I think it touches on something relevant. What it seems to mean to me, is being able to represent yourself in a way that is different than most would, or in other words, it portrays personality and individuality. I tend to do this a lot. I try to speak in ways that sets me apart from a lot of other people, or rather, I try to speak in a way that accurately depicts my personality.

So then what about the times where I am not "well-spoken"? Am I not acting in the way that parallels my actual personality? Am I unlike myself? I think I would agree with these statements, I mean, after all I'm not acting in the way that I would like, and I guess I find this mostly displeasing due to the fact that the other person probably isn't getting a good sense of who I am.

Well, while that opened a window, it still didn't answer the question as to why I go through these speaking 'cycles'

Err, I think I might be stuck. you can't tell from the post, but I've been sitting here for about a half hour now, and I can't come up with anything.

Eureka! I remember something my friend told me! A while ago my friend was talking to me about some research he was doing, and how when we perform tasks long enough, they become embedded in our minds, and we no longer have to think when we perform certain tasks. He also said that if we ever try to think during those tasks again, our thought process interferes with what we have started to deem as automatic. Something similar happened to me just the other day. I was driving back from LaGuardia Airport and a bug got smeared on my windshield. I looked down at the lever I needed to use to spray on the wiper fluid, and on it, it said "pull" and so I tried to pull it... but it wouldn't work. I thought to myself, how is it that I can't figure out how to do this when I've done it so many times in my life. Why is this trivial task causing me so much difficulty. The problem was that I was thinking about it to much. Whenever I performed this simple task in the past, I didn't think about it at all, I just did it. It was committed to muscle memory, something I didn't have to think about, and when I did try to think about it, I guess my manual thoughts interfered with my automatic ones, and I failed at accomplishing what I set out to do.

Oh and, for those of you that care, I was pulling the lever out to the side when I should have been pulling it towards me... D'oh.

So I guess when we take that information and apply it to my speaking habits, we can better understand why I speak well at times, and poorly at others. When I am well-spoken, I am not really thinking about what I am going to say or do before I do it, I just simply do it. It is automatic. However, when I am thinking about what I want to say, my thought process interferes with how I would speak/act on instinct, and I fumble.

Now some of you are going to recall that in the beginning of this post when I was describing the "smile" encounter, that I was in fact thinking about what I wanted, and that I actually planned it out. Well, while this is true, when I think back to that encounter, I wasn't actually thinking about what I was actually going to do, I was thinking more about what kind of response I wanted, and how I wanted it all to play out rather than what I was actually going to say or do.

So then I guess what we can infer from all this is that before I speak, instead of thinking about what I am actually going to say, I should rather think about how I want the conversation to go, which shouldn't interfere with my automatic speaking abilities. Very interesting.

Well, I'm going to end here since I'm a little tired from thinking so much. But before I go, I have a question for you all:

How do you represent your personality?

Try to be really specific. Don't just say "I act in a way that's different from other people"; Think about what it is in the way you act that sets you apart.

Well, that's all I've got.

Stay frosty

E3 Follow-up

So yea, here's a video which pretty much goes hand in hand with what I said in my analysis on E3 last week:

http://www.gametrailers.com/video/best-press-best-of-e3/51398

I know what I'm talking about.

Mass Effect

Okay, so like my last post, this one isn't going to be "typical" either. I just wanted to tell you all about my experience over the past few days.

Let's begin.

So last Saturday, I was sitting in my room with nothing to really do. I looked over at my Xbox and all the usual suspects were there: Halo 3, Gears of War 2, Street Fighter 4 - blah blah you get the picture. Now sure, I could sign on to Xbox Live and start gaming it up with people from across the world, but something was different, I just didn't feel like it.

I've been gaming online for a while now and lately it just hasn't appealed to me as much as it used to. Yea it's fun, but there was something missing from the experience and I just couldn't put my finger on it. When playing games in my youth, I was often filled with this indescribable feeling that made me incredibly happy. Presently, I can't remember the last time I felt that way. None of the current generation games that I have played seem to reignite the old flames of my youth, but why?

I think it's because in my youth, multiplayer games didn't exist on the scale that they do today. The majority of the games that I played were single player experiences, which made me feel in ways that multiplayer games could never duplicate.

I was talking to a very close friend of mine, and he was currently playing a game called "Mass Effect". I knew of the game, but have never played. Back when it came out, it got phenomenal reviews from almost every major gaming website. Why didn't I pick it up back when? I didn't have an Xbox at the time. I do however, remember feeling like it would be a game I'd pick up if I did have the appropriate console. My friend told me that he picked it up for $15 used at Gamestop, and that was all I needed to grab my car keys and head to my nearest Gamestop.

Sure enough, the game was right on the shelf, at a measly $15 USD. While I was checking out, the cashier kept telling me what a fantastic game it was. I simply replied, "Yea, I don't know why I didn't pick it up sooner."

My comment was just an attempt to make some form of conversation. In truth, I was a little doubtful if I'd enjoy the game or not. I was merely purchasing it as something to hold me over for the weekend.

I went home, turned on my TV, my Xbox, put the game disc in, and began to play. The next thing I knew, it was 2AM. Whoa. What the hell happened to the day? I was completely and utterly immersed in the world that the game presented me. The attention to detail was absolutely obscene. The writing was incredibly sharp, and the plot was not only interesting, but highly believable. Everything in the game seemed possible to me. It all made sense, it felt like I was actually viewing something in the galaxy that was actually happening.

It's because of all this that I actually refuse to admit that Mass Effect is merely a game. Mass Effect for me is not a game, it is an experience. One that I will never forget. As a convenience, I will refer to Mass Effect as a game for the remainder of this blog, but by no means do I mean that literally. I'm serious.

The game focuses around placing you in the role of a character who interacts with almost everyone around him, and the choices you make ultimately affect how the story progresses. In the game, I could speak with pretty much almost everything that moved. In every conversation, I could choose how to respond in anyway that I wanted. If there was something I wanted to ask a particular character, I had the option to ask that. I was never left wondering anything, since everything I wanted to know was open to talk about. This played a huge part in placing me in my character's shoes. I wasn't simply role playing a character I created... I was the character.

Now when I typically play a game, I know it isn't real. I understand there's a bad guy out there who needs to be stopped, and if I die, no big deal, I just try again. In Mass Effect however, I was so enthralled with the story that I legitimately disliked the antagonist, and was doing everything in my power to stop him. I felt for the characters. I felt reassured by my crew members, disdain for the galactic government for always handing me the short end of the stick, and enthusiasm when meeting new characters. While the game is not reality, for me, over the past few days it was.

So then, after I was fully immersed, the game ran me through quite possibly the most epic plot I have ever experienced. Sure, in Gears of war you save a planet, in Halo you save humanity, but in Mass Effect... I saved the galaxy. More specifically, I saved a believable galaxy filled with an uncountable number of believable species from a believable threat. As everything I was thrust into teetered toward the brink of inevitable annihilation, I was doing everything I could have to prevent it from happening, and I couldn't have felt more alive.

To be perfectly honest, after I finished the game, I got a little depressed. Since I feel as though the places in this game, the people, the technology could actually exist, I find it sad that I am grounded here on Earth. Now I wouldn't take myself as a savior of all organic life, I just want to experience the vastness of the universe. Earth is just a spec on a spec on a spec when compared to the universe as a whole. Unimaginable things exist out in the traverses of space, things we can't even fathom, and I find that to be fascinating.

For those of you who have never experienced Mass Effect, I implore you to play it. Everything about the game is of the highest cinematic quality, everything down to the credits music (I'm not joking either). This post might have been a little vague, but I did that for your own good. I don't want to spoil anything for any of you, and in truth, I probably can't seeing as how everyone will derive their own unique experience from Mass Effect.

E3

This post is a little bit different than most. I just wanted to give my thoughts on E3 this year based on the Microsoft, Nintendo, and Sony press conferences.

First off, I was very disappointed with Nintendo overall. the majority of the titles they released were DS games, and it didn't look like they were giving the Wii much attention at all. New Super Mario Bros. Wii was unimpressive in my book, as it's the same Mario formula we've seen in the past, but with multiplayer. I'm sorry, but it just wasn't interesting enough. Mario Galaxy 2 left me uninspired as well. I mean yea, we all know it will be good and fun to play, but it looked pretty much exactly the same as Mario Galaxy 1, except with some new powerups, which classify as simple gimmicks in my book. I wanted more legitimately new material from Nintendo, and this was not it. Other than that, they presented a lot of games that I don't see why they had to unveil at E3. A dating sim game for girls? Is that really a game that has enough caliber that it needs to be shown at the premier electronics event of the year? I don't think so. Yes, it shows Nintendo is trying to appeal to mass audiences, but we already know Nintendo is doing this. There is no need to show this type of content at a press conference. Also, the Zelda game. I was expecting maybe a new Zelda title that we haven't heard about yet, but they only showed spirit tracks, which we have already known about.

Overall, the only games from Nintendo that I am genuinely looking forward to are Golden Sun DS (It's about time), the new Kingdom hearts (although this was announced way before E3 started, so it doesn't really count), and the new Metroid, which looks absolutely incredible. The fact that they got team ninja to design this game has given me goosebumps, and I can only imagine what the people who brought us ninja gaiden have in store for our beloved series.

Perhaps the most disappointing thing about Nintendo's press conference however, was the motion plus accessory. Nintendo is drowning themselves in peripherals, and it's as if they are saying that their games can't be enjoyed without yet another piece of plastic. Furthermore, this is the only thing that Nintendo has done to update their technology. I want to speak with their marketing department. Nintendo KNOWS that Sony and Microsoft have R&D departments, and they should have been prepared to face motion sensory technology from their competitors and stay one step ahead of the game. The Wii motion plus add-on does not do this at all. Their technology is now on equal footing with Sony's (although Nintendo's add-on makes their controller even more clunky than Sony's and even less streamlined), and behind Microsoft's (more on those two later). That being said, Nintendo is going to maintain market share in 2009 because they will continue to rope in new gamers with Wii fit plus and the like.

I think Sony had the best press conference in terms of overall content this year. When compared to the other two companies, Sony had the largest amount of games that I was actually interested in, and I never really found myself bored during their presentation. Microsoft and Nintendo's conferences on the other hand started off relatively weak IMO. I found myself leaving the room during their presentations because the games they were showing me just did not appeal to me. In my opinion, Sony started off strong, and kept it up for pretty much the entire time aside from the pink PSP for girls - something they didn't have to spend time on at E3. That type of announcement isn't ground breaking enough to be presented at an event as big as E3 (although barbie horse adventure does look pretty fun >_>). For Final Fantasy, I just want 13 to come out already, and I was expecting some footage on FF13 versus, since I actually have no idea what it is and why it's different than the regular 13. And then Square Enix really upset me once again. They announced FF14, but it's not a traditional RPG; It's an MMO, like FF11. I don't mind if they make a final fantasy MMO, just don't give it the Roman Numeral it doesn't deserve. I thought they would have learned after all the complaints they got from FF11. But regardless, it did look pretty good.

I like the design of the new PSP go, and the fact that they are going to keep it purely digital in terms of how you buy your games - we're approaching an age where we wont have to look for games, wipe discs, or blow cartridges and this pleases me. I like the idea of being able to rent downloadable games as well. The lack of a second analog nub however, is very disappointing to me. If you're going to make a mid-life cycle update, fix all the problems that people had been complaining about... like the lack of a second analog. The price is a bit high, however. At $249, it costs the same as a Wii, and I'm not sure there will be enough gaming content to warrant the purchase, if the old PSP is any indication of what the PSP go will be like in terms of software. However, with all the games being downloaded now, that leaves more room open to more bite-sized games, which appeal to me a lot since they don't require a lot of dedication to play through, and offer a quick gaming fix when on the move. The lack of a PS3 price drop didn't surprise me, as lowering the price at the holiday season makes better sense to me anyways, since they can offer bundle packs for their big name titles like God of War 3. However, if they don't lower the price this holiday, I will be very, very disappointed at a poor marketing move.

As for the motion controls, it was nifty, but the controller looked like a sex toy. Overall it doesn't provide enough "new" appeal to me. It's a refined Wiimote, which hasn't been incredibly special in the past, and I don't see it being used in many hardcore games in the future. At this point in time I can only see it as a casual gaming device that will pull more people into the gaming market; but if the price of the PS3 remains the same, people will continue to be reluctant to invest, and if they do invest, they'll go for the cheapest console that offers such technology: The Wii.

For Microsoft, I have some of the same gripes with them as I do with Nintendo. First off, the irrelevant content. They opened with Rock Band, The Beatles. As much as I love the Beatles, the 360 has only one exclusive song. One. That does not warrant them opening with a 5-10 minute presentation on this game. Furthermore, when Paul and Ringo came on stage, it was as if they were not prepped for the event, didn't know what to say, and most importantly, it seemed like they didn't care. Now I could care less if the actual Beatles liked video games or not, just don't have them speak at an electronics convention if they don't. It seemed to me like they never played a game in their lives. The irrelevant content went on pretty much until they announced Left 4 Dead 2, which surprised me a little bit considering how short a time period Left 4 Dead 1 has been out. Didn't Valve promise us downloadable content with the first one? I may be mistaken, but if they did, that's a slap in the face to their consumers.

Next up was Halo. They showed gameplay to ODST and it looked okay. It's pretty much the same Halo we've seen time and time again, and I think Bungie is reluctant to let go of their franchise for good (same goes for Kojima and Metal Gear btw). Then they presented another not-really trailer in the form of Halo: Reach. I don't know what to think of it really because they didn't show anything. The "trailer" however, was well done, provided intrigue, and was a bit artistic. It also goes to show that Bungie doesn't want to be original, and instead they are fully content with releasing the same type of game over and over, which disappoints me considering how much talent they have in their studio.

And then they had Metal Gear Rising. A metal gear game on the xbox. The trailer wasn't really a trailer, but that's okay, I wouldn't expect any gameplay footage or even a cinematic trailer at this point, but what I don't understand is how Hideo Kojima plans to work on two metal gear games simultaneously. He's working on Metal Gear Peacewalker for the PSP go, and now Metal Gear Rising. I don't know how he plans to work on both projects and be able to finish in a reasonable amount of time, so I am left to assume that since he said the MGS4 team will be working on Peacewalker along with himself, that he is not going to work on Rising, he only lent out the rights to Microsoft to use the Metal Gear franchise on their console. Either that, or he's going to work on them one after another, in which case we might not see Rising for some time.

I don't remember when they showed it in Microsoft's press conference, but by far my favorite normal game that was shown at E3 was Alan Wake. The story was mildly interesting, but I actually felt a connection to the characters in the cinematic trailer they showed. When they followed that up with the actual gameplay, I felt like it came together in a very well crafted way. While playing, Alan talks to himself in his head in the form of a voice over, and it helps you stay focused to the task at hand. When engaged with enemies, there seemed to be automatic (?) slow motion effects that gave the game some real cinematic edge, although I can't be sure if the slow motion was activated by the player or not. The game just felt like an interactive movie, but in a good way. It wasn't just a bunch of quick time events like Heavy Rain, it felt more like you were being put inside the place of the character for the duration of the demo, something I found very appealing.

And then, Microsoft hit us with what I thought was the most ground breaking, and innovative piece of technology at E3: Project Natal. I showed the intro to my brother, and he told me that this type of technology shouldn't exist yet. For those of you who haven't seen it, here is a link:

http://www.gametrailers.com/video/e3-09-project-natal/50013

When I first saw this, I was blown away. The possibilities seem endless, and the family interaction made me forget what Nintendo was even trying to do to the industry. I strongly feel that this is the next step in gaming. Playing games without a controller will bring in ridiculous amounts of non gamers to the industry. Being able to skype with your friends through your television, and digitally share information with one another is just one more step towards making our lives convenient, not to mention that if you can digitally "preview" clothing and how it will look on you like it showed in the trailer, I will invest in Microsoft stock asap. The voice/facial recognition that they showed made Natal seem like it was part of the family. I feel primitive now when I pick up my remote to play DVDs. The possibilities are vast, and I can picture my future children and family using this technology.

But that wasn't all that was shown. Just when I thought it was too good to be true, Peter Molyneux showed up, and presented us with Milo:

http://www.gametrailers.com/video/e3-09-lionhead-milo/50016

Wow. That's all I have to say. I would be very hesitant at asking "What is Milo?" because Milo is a he. Emotional recognition, conversation based on previous conversation - we're not just playing a game, but rather, we are interacting with something, someone - a virtual friend. At one point, I literally screamed like a little girl, something I have never done before out of impulse. I can only imagine how this technology is going to develop in the future, and I am left to assume that this will eventually turn into a real skynet once Milo becomes self aware.

So until Natal reaches the public, the Wii will have dominance of the market and Sony will be gaining some as well once they release some of their motion control games as well as lower their price. But in conclusion, I strongly feel that Natal is the beginning of a new age of technology, one that can potentially revolutionize the way we live.